Who does she look like? She has Daddy’s eye lids, but my big pupils. Daddy’s nose, and sharper face

Looking pretty serious here.

Zara’s pretty loving towards meimei the minute they met. She wants to ‘sayang’ meimei every time when meimei cries or frets by stroking and singing to meimei. She likes to hug meimei for no reason. Drinking milk together in the night.

Meimei’s small hands compared to mine.

Update on Zara
When we asked Zara what we should call meimei since we have already shortlisted to 2 names, and we wanted her to choose one, she just said “mei mei’s name is mei mei.”

Zara has also started to ask the Why question. E.g. “Why the korkor (Chinese : big brother) nose like that one” when she saw a picture of a boy with big longish nose.

Zara’s is getting better in reasoning.
Daddy asked her to walk when all she wanted was to be carried when they go for their park trip. She told daddy, “Daddy carry Zara. Daddy need(s) excercise.”
I told her to stay away from meimei since she is not fully recovered from chicken pox and she told me, “I’m feeling better already. I eat (ate) my chicken pox medicine already.”

And she started calling Daddy “Dad” and me “Mum”. I have no idea where she learn that (TV maybe?).

She woke up one morning and started crying, big drops of tears flowing down (not the wailing type of crying).
Me : What happened?
Zara : Mummy gone!
Me : Did you have a bad dream?
Zara : *still crying* Mummy gone to Morib.
Me : Mummy is not gone, see, mummy is here.
Zara : *smiled and wiped her tears* Yeah, mummy is here. Not gone.

On our last visit to the Dr.
Zara : Zara ask Dr Jason to take out baby from mummy’s stomach.
Me : Why?
Zara : Then mummy can go to the park with Zara. Zara can sit on mummy’s lap on the swing, then Zara and mummy can swing high high.
(She missed the time I used to sit her on my lap and we shared a swing together)

Earlier today.
Zara : Mummy, Daddy, Zara, family.
Me : Yeah, later we’ll have mei-mei. Then it’ll be Mummy, Daddy, Zara, mei mei. We’re a family. Zara : I don’t want mei mei. Zara’s family only have Mummy, Daddy and Zara.

When I tugged her to bed, I prepped her for tomorrow.
Me : Tomorrow mummy will go to the hospital and stay there ok? Zara sleep with Daddy in the night.
Zara : *started crying* I don’t want mummy to go to hospital, I want mummy to stay with Zara. Me : Zara can come and visit mummy with Daddy you know.
Zara : *still crying* Then Zara say hi to mummy. *started wailing* I don’t want.
Me : Ok ok. We talk about happier things then. What did we do today.. let’s see…….
Zara : *stopped her crying*

We had very bad experience with our first confinement lady (CL) when we had Zara. Being extremely unhygenic (picked nose then applied diaper cream on Zara; dipped a spoon into her mouth to taste her own cooking and then using the same spoon to stir the broth later), totally non supportive of my breast feeding plan (when Zara cried because of hunger, she started chanting, “aiyo, girl girl ah, mummy naughty ah, don’t let you drink powder milk ah“, as though I wasn’t already stressed enough) and rough (the thumping sound she made when she burped Zara was heart breaking); she got the boot the 2nd day. I took care of Zara on my own (no MIL to offer help, didn’t trust maid with Zara) with a few visits from the hospital nurse to teach me how to bath and care for Zara.

We are trying our luck the 2nd time this round. Since I only started looking for one after I got my amnio result (into 5th month), we were not left with many choices (better ones were already hired). I haven’t met the CL, don’t know what she looks like, how she is.

Daddy is extremely skeptical about leaving baby at night with the CL alone in a room for that one month. Since I’m going to breast feed anyway, we plan to have the CL sleep with me in our room, while Daddy takes the guest’s room.

The thing is where will the CL sleep? On our queen size bed with me? Err.. I don’t think I want that. On Zara’s bed? Hah, here is what Zara said when we tried to ‘negotiate’ with her.
Me : “Zara let Aunty sleep on your bed, then Zara sleep with mummy on mummy’s bed ok? At night, mummy can hug hug you to sleep (to ‘motivate’ her)”
Zara : “Zara’s bed is Zara’s. Aunty sleep downstairs on the sofa.”
Me : “There are lots of bugs downstairs at night.”
Zara : *pointing to the guest’s room* “Aunty sleep in the other room.”
Me : “Daddy is sleeping there already… We changed the mattress, bed sheets on your bed, then Zara let Aunty sleep on your bed can or not?”
Zara : “Nooo! This is special bed *pointing to her bed*, only Zara can sleep here. Nobody can sleep” (and I was worried she won’t settle in her own bed, when we moved her from her cot to the bed)
Me : “Then where will aunty sleep?”
Zara : *pointed to the floor in our room* “Sleep there then.”

So, here is our plan, we’ll be setting up another single bed in our room near the cot, and have the CL sleep there for that month.

Have a look at the room now, it’ll turn into a dorm when the other bed is moved in!

Most of the evenings after dinner (especially now when it’s close to Christmas, and she sees Christmas trees every where), Zara will ask us to play the Christmas Karaoke VCD for her. She only selects a few songs she wants to listen to or have interesting videos.

These are her demands when she’s watching the video.
“Mummy come, sit near near Zara, Zara scared with (of) Santa Clause (which appears in the Jingle Bell video)”
“I don’t want Fer lis na we dah (Feliz Navidad).”
“I want Rudolf The Red Nose Reindeer only.”
“I want Pram-pam-pam one (Drummer Boy).”
“I want the one got horse pulling carriage one.”
While playing one video, sometimes, “I don’t want the next one, I’m scared with (of) the statue.”

Since I’m the one who’s familiar with the VCD (which songs have which scene etc.), I have to sit with her the whole time she watches the VCD.

One of her favourite video in the VCD is Rudolf The Red Nose Reindeer, and after a few listening, she started to be able to sing some part of the song. Here’s her singing, with me helping out. (Half way through, you can actually hear her say, “I want birdnest.” One of her favourite after dinner treat these days, which I’m making quite often for baby and myself.)

Zara has been calling Daddy other names other than just Daddy.
When we are going home from my sis’ place, she would announce, “I’m going home already, to see my Old Man, Bob The Builder.”
When she has shouted for Daddy many times and got no response from him, she’ll start using his name (first and last name together), “XXXXX LOW! XXXXX LOW!” Just like I would address him when I don’t get any response from him.

~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~

She started to have some sense of time, and started using words to describe the past. However, she’s still confuse with the usage, and it’s cute to see her attempts.
E.g. “Just now we went to Cowboy town, the pony kick kick Zara right?” (although it wasn’t just now but some time back.)
“Last time Zara saw reindeer in Ikea, and point(ed) to Mummy and Daddy.” (although it was something that happened the day before)

Me : “Zara you shu-shu (Chinese : Pee) is it?”
Zara : “No, I didn’t. I (am) lying down only” (she was on the bed trying to get herself to sleep).

Me : “How are you today? Do you still have runny nose?”
Zara : “No I didn’t (don’t). I’m feeling better already.”

~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~

She likes to help Tuyam with her pronunciation or us when we can’t find the right word to use.
Me : “Remember in Phuket, you saw the lobster in the restaurant, hmm.. what are those things on the lobster’s head? *using my pointer to make the ‘horn’ on the head* antenna?”
Zara : “Mummy, it’s fillers mummy! It’s fillers.” *grinning happily*
(Is it really called fillers? I actually don’t know, but that’s what Daddy told her during the trip and she remembers.)

Tuyam : *Pointing to a bee picture on her book* “See this ‘beh’ flying flying.”
Zara : “Bees lah. Kakak, Bees”

~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~

Yesterday, she was crying so much for me before her nap. Wanted me to give her milk and nap with her. After her nap, when she was in a better mood :
Me : “Why did Zara cry just now? Kept asking for mummy?”
Zara : “……..” (she always doesn’t like to talk about embarrassing stuff, and crying is one)
Me : “Tell mummy, why did Zara cry just now?”
Zara : “Because mummy pregnant (I started wondering what has this got to do with her crying) . *She paused then continued* (obviously trying to find the right words) Zara wants to sayang sayang (Malay: TLC) mummy.”

~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~

On a loving day,
Zara : “Zara is mummy’s ?? (precious). And mummy is Zara’s ??.”

Knowing someone loves you and cares for you, especially your 2 year old is oh.. so.. precious. Here are some precious moments of mine.

Zara : *fussing and did not want Daddy to brush her teeth for her* I want mummy do! Mummy! Mummy! Mummy do.
Me : *from the bed room, giving excuse* Zara, mummy stomach painful, cannot brush your teeth. Let Daddy do.
Zara : I want to go out, I want to go out
Daddy : Brush your teeth first. Then you go out.
Zara : I want to go out, give mummy medicine.
(She probably thought the Multivits that I get her to feed me nightly will help with my (fake) stomach ache.)

Me : Mummy cannot carry you so much because mummy’s stomach so big, carrying you will make mummy’s back painful
Zara : *points to my massage oil* Mummy give you (me) the oil?
Me : What oil?
Zara : The oil to massage mummy. I want to massage massage mummy’s back.
(Daddy gave me a massage once for my shoulder ache, and she was ‘helping’ out. So she thought she could help relieve my back ache with a massage.)

Me : I love you Zara
Zara : *big lovely grin* I also love you mummy

After a week of celebrations (another birthday song singing just within the family, a trip to Kidzsports and Gymboree) and not being well (sore throat from all the nasi lemak and little fish, fever, cough, flu), finally the birthday season is over. 😛

Here is just for my record, her 2year old development.

~ Weight : 10.2kg (taken during her fever)
~ Height : 86.3cm

Emotions and Character
~ I’m not sure if it’s a two year old thing or it’s because our 2nd one is coming, she’s extremely clingy to me. She prefers me to tuck her to bed, even for her afternoon nap (she’ll cry if I don’t do it but I just ignored it), she only wants me to bath, she’s always asking me to look after her instead of working, “Mummy look after Zara, don’t want mummy to work”
~ She’s expressing her love, by kissing us or by saying, “I love you Mummy” (almost every night before she goes to bed), “I love you Daddy” (occasionally).
~ She is becoming a handful especially when we go out shopping, and she goes wild running here and there, climbing this rack and that.
~ She loves going to the super markets (Giant is her favourite because of the free kiddy rides)
~ Very stubborn, especially if she has set her mind on something (e.g don’t want to take bath, don’t want to have her meal). However, my ultimate weapon, ignore her or send her to the naughty corner, or sometimes smacking (I’m really trying to avoid smacking her, but there are times when she’s really unreasonable even after much coaxing, and I sometimes blame it on my raging hormones.. I know it’s just an excuse).

Language
~ She is doing very well in this respect
~ She’s making up the lyrics of songs she knows spontaneously, e.g. when I can’t find my car keys, she’ll go “Where oh where is mummy’s car keys, Oh where oh where can it be?” (singing to the tune Where Oh Where Has My Little Dog gone)
~ She started picking up Malay and Mandarin words; speaking to Tuyam using some Malay or to us using some Mandarin. E.g. “Kakak, this one very sedap (tasty)”; “Kakak, Zara tak mau (don’t want)”; “Zara is mummy’s ?? (precious)”; “Mummy, Zara ?? (don’t want).”

Toilet training – I wonder when she’ll be potty/toilet trained
~ She’s getting adversely affected by the smell of poo and urine. Especially her own. She vomited once when I got her to pee in the shower cubicle before her bath and she smelled her own urine; she also vomited when I got her to flush her stool away and refused to do it again (normally I flush her stool even when she did her business on the diaper)
~ She once said, “I don’t want to poo poo already. Poo poo is so smelly.” when trying to control her bowel movement
~ She knows to be a big jie-jie (Chinese : big big-sister), she has to stop wearing diaper, but she doesn’t want to use the toilet bowl or her potty because she said, “Shu shu and poo poo is so smelly.”
(Tips anyone?)

Food
~ Very fussy with what she eats and has very acute sense of taste. Just a speck of coriander on her steam fish, and she’ll spit out that piece with the coriander mixed with it.
~ Doesn’t eat a lot of things, and doesn’t eat much, and it’s making us worried. We’re trying to psycho her into saying if she doesn’t eat, she’ll be very thin like her mama (Chinese : paternal grandma), and won’t have muscle like daddy or have body shape like mummy, and it helps sometimes, saying she wants to have body like mine (Ha! Wait till she’s older, but now, I’ll just savour this).
~ Loves ice cream, sausages, chocolate, pop corn, cheese. For real meals, she likes rice or porridge with ikan bilis (Malay : little fish or anchovies); macaroni and cheese; garlic bread.
~ Have 3 or 4milk feeds : 6oz in the morning upon waking, 6oz in the afternoon before her nap, 4oz in the night before bed, and sometimes 6oz in the early mornings which started recently (she’s preparing me for my night feed)

I have slightly more than a month to go before No. 2 arrives. There are 2 things which I’m cracking my head with.

1st : No. 2’s name
Daddy and I can’t decide on a name for No.2. We wanted a two syllables name which starts with Z and ends with A. That doesn’t leave us much choice. Daddy doesn’t like my choice of names, and I don’t like his choices.

Anybody has any names to recommend?

(Some jokers have suggested Zebra. Well, even if they named their kids Hippo or Oinky, we still won’t name ours Zebra)

2nd : What are we to do with Zara when I have to be in the hospital to have the baby?
When Zara was born, Daddy was in the hospital with me the 2nights I stayed there. Now, Zara has never slept without either one of us at her side. I’m not sure what we are going to do when I have to be admitted this time.

1) Have Daddy stay at home with her, so I’ll be alone in the hospital?
2) Have her stay with us in the hospital together?

We asked her if she would be ok to sleep at home with Kakak when mummy goes to the hospital. She said, “Cannot. I want to sleep with mummy only.”
The only person she’s willing to sleep with without mummy is Sam, her favourite jie-jie. She said, “Can sleep with Sam jiejie, mummy stay in hospital.”

For those who have two kids, what do you do with no. 1 when you were in the hospital giving birth to no. 2?

~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~

Zara is getting more and more clingy even with Tuyam back. They can play together, Tuyam can feed and change her; but when it comes to nap time, Zara would be whining for me, “I want mummy to sleep with Zara.”

When it’s time for her evening bath, and if Daddy wanted to bath her, she would say, “Don’t want Daddy. Want mummy do only. Mummy do, mummy do.” followed by crying if we don’t oblidge.

At night, only I can sleep next to her. If Daddy stayed on too long at her side after saying good night to her, she would say, “Daddy sleep there (pointing to Daddy’s side of the bed).” or “Daddy go down (from my bed)” If Daddy lied on her bed.

Yesterday, when Daddy got her things ready and wanted to brush her teeth (most days I do the brushing), she told Daddy, “Daddy brush la. Use Zara’s toothpaste, use Zara’s tooth brush. Ok? Daddy brush la, use Zara’s water to rinse mouth. Zara don’t want”.

I wonder how I will be able to cope with a clingy 2 year old, and a new baby.

Today is Zara’s actual birthday, I’m supposed to write about her monthly development, but I’ll do that later. I want to write about her negotiation skill and how good she’s getting at it.

Zara : Mummy, I want to watch TV. (she started using lots of “I” instead of Zara now)
Me : No, bed time already, go and brush your teeth and change to your pajamas.
Zara : Mummy, one time only.
Me : No, it’s bed time.
Zara : Mummy, please. One time only. *puting out her pointer to show ONE*
Me : Ok then. One time yeah.
Zara : Ok. *happily sat down and wait for me to put on her program for her*
After finishing
Me : Ok, time to get ready for bed.
Zara : Mummy, one more time.
Me : No. Enough already.
Zara : Please. Last time. Last time only.
Me : No. Just now you said one time only. So, you already watched one time, so get ready for bed now.
Zara : Last time please. *looked at me with Bambi eyes*
Me : Ok ok.. one last time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~

She had fever yesterday, and started recovering today.
Zara : (for lunch) I want to eat nasi lemak (Malay : Coconut rice) with little fish.
Me : No, you still have a bit of fever, cannot eat nasi lemak with little fish.
Zara : I’m feeling better already.
Me : No, not today. When you are all well ok?
Zara : Little bit only. Please.
Me : No. (not this time)

~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tuyam got her a set of toy bathing set from Indonesia which came with hair dryer, shampoo, comb etc. After opening up Tuyam’s present, she wanted to try it on Sam, and ‘wash’ Sam’s hair.
Sam oblidged, but after the N-th time, she wanted to stop.
Zara : Sam jie-jie, I want to wash your hair.
Sam : No thanks.
Zara : You must wash your hair. *pulling strands of her own hair to show Sam* After sticky. Got cockroach in the hair. Got bugs. Got lizard. I wash for you, ok?
Sam : ……

~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~

When she asked for me, and I’m in a meeting, she would wail and cry for the whole duration of my meeting. So I asked her :
Me : Why Zara always cry when mummy is in a meeting.
Zara : Because Zara loves mummy.
Me : *melted* Mummy loves you too, but why you cry?
Zara : Because Zara don’t (doesn’t) like mummy to close the door
(I always close the door to the study when I have a meeting just in case the people on the other side of the line can hear her)
Me : Oh.. But mummy needs to close the door because mummy needs to talk to uncle and aunty on the phone. It doesn’t mean mummy don’t love you.
Zara : *look at me like she understood*
Me : Mummy will always love you ok? Even when mummy is upset or angry, mummy still love you. Mummy love you very much. But mummy just can’t carry you or have you sit on mummy’s lap when mummy have meeting ok?
Zara : ok. (not sure if she understood though, but she loves being re-assured that I love her)

Some of her conversation with us that tickled me.

Me : Do you want to watch Chinese jiejie show (referring to ??? musical VCD).
Zara : Want. Chinese jiejie got hair clips. Zara’s hair clip upstairs in the box (referring to the box I kept all her hair clips).
Me : Yeah. But Zara doesn’t like mummy put hair clip for Zara. You always want to take it out.
Zara : Because it’s painful. Mummy put hairclip is painful. Take out then must comb comb the hair.

Daddy : Tomorrow is Sunday where does Zara want to go?
Zara : ……
Daddy : Maybe we can go to Lake Gardens. Can go to the dinosaur playground, feed the monkeys. How about that?
Zara : Sounds like fun!

Zara : Don’t want kakak KC.
Me : Why?
Zara : Because kakak is so uh-gree (ugly).
Me : Oh, that’s not nice. If you have good manners you won’t say something like that.
Zara : *spent a few seconds thinking* Because kakak is not family. Mummy, Daddy and Zara is family.
Me : But you let kakak Tuyam jaga (Malay : Take care of) you.
Zara : Kakak Tuyam is oso (also) family. This one new kakak, not family.
Me : ….

I had a short nap while Daddy looked after her, and when I woke up, she came to me and stuck her face real near mine and asked, “Mummy, Are you feeling better now?”
..She’s really growing up…

~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Btw, it has been crazy for me over the last few days. Sis’ Filipino maid has to go back to Philippines because of family emergency, and sis needs her Indonesian maid back. So no one to baby sit Zara (although I could still send her to my sis’ place, Zara just refused to let the Indonesian maids care for her) and do the housework. Guess who we enrolled for help? MIL for baby-sitting Zara.

MIL has been staying with us since Sunday. Zara refused MIL as well, so she has been climbing up the stairs to the study to come to me when MIL is not looking. And I have to do the diaper changing, milk feeding, VCD/DVD playing. She won’t allow MIL to touch her, and MIL is too afraid to turn on the VCD/DVD player. Major disruption for me at work.

Another 14days before my maid returns. Hope I’ll still be sane by then.

Psst, my future in-law, do you want to help baby sit Zara? I’ll give you discount on the dowry.