Having 2 daugthers who are of similar sizes do have its advangtage. They can share clothes.

If a dress is too short, just add a pair of pants.

She saw how her jiejie wore the dress with a pair of pants, she wanted the same (although the dress is long enough for her).

Daddy and I are not the most loving couple, but recently, we try to have more couple time by sneaking going out for meals without the girls (mind you, the times we did this are probably ~ 5 times since Zara was born but they all happened this year). Here is my marriage counsellor’s view.

Me : Do you think Daddy love mummy?
Zara : No, I don’t think so.
Me : Why don’t you think Daddy love mummy?
Zara : If he loved you right, he will have a party like the party Ah Ku have for Ah Kim. o.O”

When we got back from late lunch without the girls on Saturday (we actually went out while the girls took their naps to a near by restaurant for lunch, but Zara woke up earlier than normal so she ‘caught us’ red handedly), Zara was very upset, and started questioning why we went out without them etc.
I had to spend a great deal of time explaining to her, in gist, I told her we are married, and sometimes we need to have some time on our own without them, so that we will be closer and more loving etc.

On Sunday, when we went to have lunch in Fish & Co (this time with the girls of course), Zara said, “Mummy and Daddy, the 2 of you sit that side (pointing to 1 side of the table with 2 seats). Zaria and me sit this side. Then you can spend time together.” o.O”

Comments on previous post : Ok, I have decided that it’s a good thing that Zara is able to talk back, and we should not discourage her unless she’s using rude words.

Besides talking, I think this girl of mine is quite good with her arts.

Here are her recent art work.

Most of her drawings are on princesses, fairies, mermaids, things she likes.

Fairies

Mama fairy, and a little fairy (top right). With worms underground.

Flower Fairy

Check out the bugs!

Mermaids

Flower Princess

2 big sisters, and 1 baby, and they are under a rainbow

She also started puting caption on some of her drawings. She draw on one page, and wrote the caption on another.

Flower.

Girl with a mop

Guess what’s she’s writing here?

This is the clue.

Lick On The Lollipop, that’s what she wrote.

Sometimes she just creates patterns.

Or even arts and crafts. Do you know what she’s trying to make here with tissue stuffed with white paper coloured with some green?

That’s her juicy pow (xiao long bao) served on a plate.

She also likes colouring, but unfortunately, do not have the patience to finish a big picture.

And the best of all, she leaves me drawings as notes. This one, she put in an ang pow (as an envolope) and left it in my wardrobe. But she doesn’t quite know how to ‘surprise’ me, she took it out to show me first, then put it back there, and said “I left you a surprise in the cupboard.”

I’m inpatient.
I stress out easily.
I can be very fierce.
Zara is rather emotional.
And Zara is very good with her words.
So, here is a recipe for disaster…

Scene 1
We were in a crowded Chinese restaurant ordering our Father’s Day dinner (Father’s Day or no Father’s Day, Daddy always leave the stress ordering in a Chinese restaurant to me so if there’s not enough food or the food does not cater to everybody, I get the blame). FIL was with us. It’s already 9pm.
Imagine my stress.
Have to order something suitable for the kids; have to order something not too hard for my FIL (since his dentures doesn’t fit him that well); have to make sure Daddy has his fish.
Zara was pretending she cooked some ‘tooth-pick’ noodle, and was serving me in the midst of a very stress me giving our orders to the waiter.
I just glared at her and said, “Later.”
While I was still choosing dishes, Zara continued, “Mummy, why are you showing me sour face?”
Because I was still busy, I didn’t answer.
“Mummy, why are you showing me sour face? You tell me? Why are you so rude?”
“Excuse me!! exCUSSSSSEE MEEEEEE! Why are you not answering me. Huh?”
I was rather annoyed and replied, “Zara, mummy is ordering dinner ok? Hush!”
After that she went quiet.
When I finished ordering, and stretched out my hand to hold hers (our ‘piece giving’ sign), she withdrew her hand, glared at me and started muttering, “Hmmph! So rude. Don’t hold my hand.”
When I explained to her I was busy, she said, “Hphmm! Why you show me sour face then? Huh? Why?”
Again I stretched out my hand and told her because I was busy ordering and she was disturbing me. She still didn’t want to accept my peace offering.
So I turned my attention to Zaria, and Zara started sobbing.
When I tried to pat/sayang her, she withdrew, and said, “Don’t touch me.”
“Aiya, don’t touch don’t touch la.” I got rather annoyed.
So the whole dinner was like that.. she’s upset I didn’t continue to try to pacify her, and when I did, she turned away.. tired.

Scene 2
It’s a rule that when we walked home from the park, the girls have to stop at the pavement and wait for me to hold their hands to cross the road.
Two days ago, Zara was dashing towards our house, and when she was close to the pavement I didn’t see her intention of stopping and there was a car coming.
I shouted very loudly to issue my warning, “Zara!! Stop!!!”
She stopped, turned back and glared at me. I stretched out my hand to hold hers and asked, “What were you trying to do? Dashing off like that?”
She folded her arm and answered “Hmmph! I was going to stop O-K!!? Why did you shout at me?”
“I saw you dashing off like that, and a car was coming, so I have to shout at you to tell you to stop right?”
“Why did you shout so loud? It’s so irritating you know or not??!!”
And then it was another round of peace offering, not accepted, upset because no more peace offering etc…. tired.

Scene 3
We were doing her Bahasa homework, and after many times of teaching her how to read the word “MALAM” (night), she was able to read M-A = MA, L-A-M= LAM, but didn’t know how to join the MA & LAM together to make the word MALAM. So I said, “M-A, MA. Now put MA in your head (and I use my index finger to point to her head). Then tell me what is L-A-M?”
She glared at me, “Don’t push my head like that ok? You are making my head spin.”
I pointed to her head again a little harder this time and said, “I just pointed at your head only. And asked you to put MA in your head.”
She folded her arms and turned away from me, “You are pushing, not pointing, ok? I don’t want you to help me with my home work. I want Daddy to help.”
Grrrrrrrr!!!!

She’s only Four and The Half, and already ‘ting-sum-ting-fai’ (Chinese : talking back, rebelling). Aigh. I wonder what it’s going to be like when she’s in her teens.

I love the way Zaria uses words she’s familiar with to pronunce new words. I love :

The way she says milipede as Lilly-pede. (Lilly is a name Zara gave to her toy tortoise).

The way she says matchmaker (from Mulan show) as Fat maker (since the matchmaker is, well, FAT).

Credit : Picture taken from iCandi.

The way she says rambutan as Rumple-utan. (from her story book Rumplestiltskin & another story about Orang Utan)

The way she says accidentally as Accident gently.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I like the way Zara talk back to Daddy (but not when she talks back to me).

Once Daddy kept correcting her Grammar, and she got fed up, “Don’t be such a show off, dad.”

Another time Zara wanted Daddy to bring her to my sis’ place so she can play with her cousins, and Daddy replied, “Why do we want to go there? So boring, nothing to do.”
Zara very quickly answered, “Oh, when you go to your mother’s place you happy la, got things to do la. When I ask you to go to my cousin’s place, you say boring la?

I like the way she prayed on some nights.
“I pray that my Daddy will not dilly dally when we want to go out.”
“I pray that my Daddy will not fall asleep when he’s jaga-ing (Malay : looking after) us.”

Zaria had this cough that has been going on for a few months. Many GP and paed trips, many bottles of Augmentine later, it got well for a few weeks and then back again. Lately, when she coughs, it’s as though there’s a lot of flam in her lungs.

I took off to bring her to see an ENT or a chest physician. When I arrived at the hospital, I was told for her age, it’s not recommended to see an ENT or chest physician instead she should be seen by a paed. As her regular paed was on leave, I let another paed see her.

After hearing her lungs, the paed said, “Her lungs are crappy.”
CRAP! That was my reaction.
Apparently, it’s crepitation. The lungs may be infected (flam caused), causing this ‘crappy’ sound in her lungs.
That explains her on off fever of 38 degrees and above, her cough with the sound of flam.
When the doctor told me she either has to 1) be admitted and go on IV-antibiotic or 2) be treated at home but any worse and she should be brought in again, I felt as though my heart was sliced.

She has been prescribed with Singulair, Zithromax and other cough mixtures.

Is this really very serious? Should I trust this new paed?

So I went to see our regular GP in the night, and showed him the med the paed recommended. He listened to Zaria’s lung and said the same thing. The lungs are crappy (is this the right term?), and the med prescribed should all help her.

Am I satisfied with what the GP said? No. This morning, I brought her to see a Chest Paed recommended by Mom2Ashley.

It seemed it’s quite common these days in kids her age. Just stick to the medicine, and it should work in 5 days. The Paed claimed Zaria has quite a lot of dust in her nostrils too, so he recommended that we change our bed sheets and wash our aircon filter every week, and also get rid of the rugs in the house.

When should I be worried?
If only she became breathless or develop a high grade fever.

So at least tonight, I’ll sleep in peace.

As a mother, I wish that her disease became mine, so that at least I know for myself if it’s serious or not; and I could suffer her pain or discomfort.

Caught her falling asleep after the trip to the chest pead

As for Zara, her rash has gone away after a week; a week of skin recovering; and then it got very dry and itchy; so much so that she scratched until it scarred. I finally succumbed to steroid cream.

I pray all these crappiness will go away soon.

Girls’ conversation About Penis

Zaria : Daddy is not a girl you know.
Zaria : He has no petpet.
Zaria : He got penis at the petpet there.

Zara : You know when boys go to she-she, they must hold the penis to she-she.
Zara : If not, right, the penis will swing here swing there, and the she-she will spray every where.

Zaria talking to Jelly About fierce Mummy
Zaria : Mummy always scold me you know
Zaria : Always shout at me. So loud!
Jelly : Your mummy got smack you or not.
Zaria : Nooooo.. she didn’t smack me.
(haha.. at least I’m not that bad)
Zaria : She shoot me only.
o.O”
(OK, I’m the bad guy at home)

On Working From Home
(This conversation with Zara’s friend took place in Zara’s school, Zaria’s friend, WY, cannot understand why someone can work from home)

WY : You don’t tell your mummy ya..
WY : *whisper* *whisper*
Zara : *loudly* Aigh. I told you before right, my mummy works at home.
Me : What did WY ask you?
Zara : She asked me why you wear like that to go to work.
(I was wearing shorts and t-shirt)
WY : *facing me* What work you do? Why work from home one? My mummy have to work in office.
Me : Hmm.. It’s special for me, that’s why I can work at home.

Another day, when I went to pick the girls up, WY came to me again.
WY : Who do you work for huh?
Me : Hmm.. (trying to find an answer where a 5yr old can understand).. My boss lor.
WY : Oh.. (asthough she understood finally) Your boss goes to your house ah?

Hehe.. I think it’s tough for children who have parents working in the ‘office’ understand the concept of working from home.

The rashes came on Thursday, started with a little on the face, legs and hands. Then, Zara had fever late that night, the fever shot up to almost 39. I’m not sure if it has something to do with the rash.

On Friday morning, her temparature was normal. She attended our neighbour’s birthday party in the morning, and we realised the rash has increased. Zara claimed it’s very itchy, and she kept scratching it even though I’d warned her not to. Her fever came back after her afternoon, but not as high as the night before.

We didn’t think it was measles and suspected it’s an allergy reaction. The whole of last week, it has been really hot, and Zara had been taking naps in the study where I had the aircon turned on. Sometimes, she just lay directly down on the wool carpet, until I noticed and insisted that she brought her matress to sleep on. I suspect Zara is like me, allergy to animal fur (even wool) and saliva, when she was 2+, she got licked by a friendly dog on the face, and she got a rash on the cheek for almost a week.

Then on Saturday, Daddy brought her to see the doctor more for her fever and cough. Daddy just asked about the rash, and the doctor claimed it’s probably an allergy reaction without prescribing anything for it. For the rest of the day and after, she didn’t have fever any more.

However, the rash got worse, probably due to the heat and all the sweating. We tried to relieve the itch by applying some ointment for her. She was using both her hands to scratch at times when she thought I wasn’t looking. The worst was her face, she has a little on the hand, and the legs, none on the body. Although she tries not to, I think sometimes it got too itchy she couldn’t help but to scratch; and the rash got so red, and her face becomes a bit puffy.

She’s feeling very tired most of the time, I’m not sure if it’s caused the rash or her cough medication.

I remember when I was younger, I used to have this kind of rash on my tighs, especially during durian season, but never on my face. My mum had to boil snake or lizard porridge for me as a remedy. I’m not sure I just grew out of it, or the exotic meat helped, I no longer had this kind of rash. Anybody has seen this before? Do you know what this is and if there’s anything that will help it?

Poor girl, I feel so sorry for her.

It’s a working day for me today. The girls were playing in the morning, when Daddy was at the wet market and Jelly was doing house work.

45mins into my conference call, I heard crying downstairs, Zaria first, followed by Zara. Then Zara came up and she sobbed while she told me, “Mummy, I pushed Zaria and she fell down, her mouth got blood.”. I thought, maybe Zaria’s lip was cut; as I was hosting the meeting, I had to get someone to replace me, before I could go check on Zaria. While I was trying to do that, Jelly came and told me, “Mum, Zaria’s teeth came off.”

Oh shit!

I quickly updated my colleague on the emergency, and checked on Zaria. One of her upper teeth has been pushed into the gums, just a tiny bit still ‘exposed’, with blood dripping down her chin. Zaria didn’t cry, but just said, “Jiejie pushed me, got so much blood you know.”.

My heart almost stopped seeing the bloody gums. And imagine my rage towards Zara. I was scolding her while comforting Zaria, and even gave her a few smacks on the buttocks. I told her police may want to investigate the case, she better had her bags packed because she might need to stay in the police station for investigation. (I’m bad, I know. Really really mean. To think back now, it doesn’t help with me aggravating the situation.)

After I found someone to be my back up, I went downstairs to get ready to bring Zaria to a nearby dentist. Zara had already taken a bag downstairs and a few pieces of her clothing. I felt sorry for her but I was still angry so I didn’t comfort her.

Daddy got back just in time to go to the dentist together.

At the dentist, I was shaking when the dentist checked on Zaria. As I was sighing a lot and kept uttering “Aiyo..” The dentist told me to have Daddy hold Zaria instead while she carried out the procedure. She said my anxiety may affect Zaria. This was what she did, first, rubbed some gel to numb Zaria’s gum, then she put local anesthetic, and then she pulled the tooth out to its original position and use a thread to tie it around the tooth and other teeth to hold its position, and hope the cells around her gum will grow and grip the tooth back. It may or may not be successful, and Zaria may have a slow growth in her 2nd set of tooth, due to the impact.

Zara and I were peeping from the outside; When I saw the big syringe taken out to inject the local anesthetic on Zaria’s gum, I almost cried. Zara was still sobbing, feeling afraid and sorry.

Zaria was a tough cookie. She didn’t cry and was very cooperative. The dentist was quite good too, she gave Zaria a pair of sunglasses, spoke calmly to her, and when she had to inject the anesthetic, or pull the tooth out, she used her other hand to cover Zaria’s eyes, so she can’t really see what was being done to her.

After everything was done, Zara said, “Luckily the dentist fixed the tooth, I don’t have to go to the police station now.” o.O”

I just hope the tooth is really fixed, and Zara will learn from the lesson of not being too rough to Zaria.

Zara’s crying phase is over and she hardly ever cries when she’s angry or upset. She may sulk, or go to a quiet corner, just to show us she’s upset, or, she will use word power.

Once I was upset with the girls for not cooperating to get into their respective car seats when we were done with shopping, I shouted at them. “GET INTO THE CAR NOW!!!”

Zara who was being playful, and wriggling about was stunt for a moment, but obediently climbed up to her car seat. After a while, she made the “Hmph!” sounds a few times, audible enough for me. When I didn’t respond to that, she said angrily, “Just now you want to tear down the ceiling?? Your voice is (was) so irritating you know?” o.O”

As for Zaria, I don’t know where she learnt it, but everytime when she’s angry with someone who tells her not do something, she’ll say “I don’t want you!” or “I don’t like you any more.” and lately, “I don’t want to friend you already.” o.O”

Of course, her trump card (or she thinks) is to cry! Loud wailing accompanied with big drops of tears. For someone who speaks softly most of the time, her crying is extremely loud! o.O”