Kids Say The Darndest Things – Zara’s and Zaria’s Chitter Chatter

May 11, 2012 at 9:18 pm

I love re-reading some of my old posts about the things the girls, recently however, instead of putting in a blog post, I put it on Facebook instead.

Just so I don’t miss some of their witty conversation, I’d better jot them down here too. These were some of their witty remarks earlier this year (I remember because I either put it on paper or update Facebook), some taken from Facebook status.

In Jan
She gave me the paper doll she created in her art class.
Zaria : Since I give you my dolly, you have to give me something.
Me : I give you my love.
Zaria : I don’t want any part of your body.
Me : I’m giving you my love. Not my body.
Zaria : Your love is from your body right? I don’t want any part of your body. o.O”

Caught Zaria watching Xmen2.
Me : I thought I told you no more Xmen show?
Zaria : But I remember in this show they didn’t say “kiss that, bitch” so I can watch right? o.O

If you’d been to the busy shops in SS15, you’ll notice near Mc Donald’s, there’s a dodgy place called Momo Hime Japanese Lounge. We passed by one night, and Zara said she wanted to check out the place.
Me : No, you can’t go there, because it’s a place for people and do hanky panky things
Zara : What’s hanky panky?
Me : When a man wants to go and date another woman who’s not his wife
Zara : You mean they go there to mate? o.O”
Possibly.. but I don’t know.

Zaria is very good with giving threats earlier this year. i.e.
If you don’t buy me the crown, I won’t let you take photo of me.
If you don’t XYZ, I won’t talk to you for 13yrs. o.O”
If you don’t …., I won’t ….. etc etc etc

Zaria asked over dinner one day. “How come in adult shows, they don’t just kiss one time, they go muak muak muak muak muak (pouting her lips she tilted her head left, then right, then left)”…. o.O”

In Mar during our holidays in Singapore;
Zaria saw so many Zara shops there, so she complained, “So not fair, every where there’s jiejie’s shop!”
Then she thought of an idea, “I want to change my name. I want my name to be Unique. So I’ll have lots of shops as well.”
(Their sirname is Low…. so Unique+Low = Uniqlo.) o.O

In Mar when I was maidless for a month.
Asked Zaria to peel garlic and onion for me.
Me : Zaria, can you please help me to peeeeeeel…………. (3s and the word is still not out)
Zaria : Onion is it?
Me : Yes. Make sure you peel them on top of tttthhhhe ………… (3s passed)
Zaria : Newspaper. Mummy, why are you loosing your words? Are you going crazy
Yes.. almost. Luckily it was only for a month.

One day, Zara kept interrupting me at work to help her with her homework. On the way to school..
Me : Next time you have to do whatever you know how to do first, then whatever you don’t, ask me at one go. I need to work you know. I cannot be interrupted so many times.
Zara : You have the whole day to do your work.
Me : It’s not a matter of whole day or not. If my boss wants something in the morning, I have to give it to him in the morning.
Zara : At least your boss don’t cane you. o.O”

Nov Chitter Chatter – Zaria

December 11, 2011 at 5:51 pm

Sarcasm

At the egg stall in the market, she touched the stacked up eggs and the vendor told her don’t touch, after the eggs will break in Cantonese.
I told her, “Auntie asked you not to touch, after the eggs break.”
She frowned, put her hand down and said, “When people hold eggs, do they just break?” o.O”
(true, eggs don’t break just because we touch or hold them)

In a bad mood, we moved to the fish monger. A few people were crowded around a pail. I went over and took a peek. It was a big live Ikan Haruan (Sang Yue/生鱼) still swimming in the pail.
I exclaimed, “Wow!”
Zaria took a look at the pail then rolled her eyes, “It’s only a fish, why you WOW for.” o.O”

Recovery

I picked up a small soft toy someone dropped at a busy train station. I asked the girls to do ‘paper, scissor, stone’ and see who can get the soft toy.
Zaria lost. So I gave the soft toy to Zara.
Zaria was angry, she snatched the soft toy from Zara and tossed it to the ground.
I picked it up, smacked her hand, and then passed the toy back to Zara.
Not even after a minute, Zaria asked Zara, “Can I put make up for your doll or not?”
(Good that she recovers very quickly. That’s her, quick to get angry, quick to cool down)

When we were buying Zara her birthday present in ToysRus, Zaria too wanted us to get her a toy dog grooming set as her advance birthday present. We issued warnings to her, i.e. once we got her that, she won’t be able to ask for another present when it’s her birthday. Of course she agreed to it.
A couple of weeks later, she saw another toy she wanted to get.
Me : “You already got the grooming set for your birthday. So no more present for you.
Zaria : “Actually, I didn’t want to get THAT, but my body wants me to get it. But this is what I really want.” o.O”

Zaria playing with the toy her ‘body’ asked her to buy

Zaria playing with the toy her 'body' asked her to buy

7 Year Olds’ Friendship

November 25, 2011 at 2:58 pm

7 year olds’ friendship is sooooo fragile.

One day it’s like this :
Friends Forever(from Chloe to Zara)

Another day it’s this :
Breaking Up letter(they have a disagreement in the car today and talked about breaking up)

Mind her spelling, she just started reading and writing independantly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another incident unrelated to the above.

I met my secondary school mate in Midvalley one day, and I told the girls she’s my BFF.
Zaria said, “Huh? I’d never seen her before. How can she be your BFF? BFF is supposed to see each other everyday.”

Me and BFFs definitely need to meet up more frequently.

If I Quit Working

September 29, 2011 at 11:13 am

I have a long day yesterday and I wasn’t happy with some of the expectation my boss has of me, especially when I’d worked so hard. I told the girls when we came back from the park, and here is the gist of our conversation.

Me : Mummy got scolded by mummy’s boss, mummy want to stop working already
Zara : It’s ok. You can do something you are good at. Like baking. You can sell your cakes and pastries.
Me : Oh, but baking doesn’t give mummy as much money. We’ll have less money to spend. Maybe we need to sell our house now and move to a smaller house.
Zara : *eyes turned wide* Move to a smaller house?…. And then…. (calculating) you have to get a smaller car as well…..? And there’ll be less food….?
Me : Ya, I think so.
Zaria : *eyes turned wide now* And go to a school with no aircon?
Me : Yup. You have to go to a kindergarten with no aircon.
Zara & Zaria : I don’t want.
Zara : You should continue working. When your boss scold you, treat it like it’s not important, and just do your work.
Me : But it’s difficult.
Zara : You told me not to quit piano when it gets difficult. So you should not quit also.
Me : *Moan*
Zara : (imagination run wild) I don’t want to move to a shed in the jungle. I don’t like scorpions, and mosquitos…….Sigh.. Sometimes I wish I just turned to something that cannot move and think.
Me : You want to be a statue?
Zara : Ya.. then I don’t have to worry about all these. o.O”

These girls are so worried about having to change their lifestyle if I quit working.

Holiday Chitter Chatter Part 2

September 9, 2011 at 9:54 pm

Angry Birds in Penang

(continue from here)

When we stopped over in Ipoh for breakfast, we told the girls Ipoh is famous for beautiful girls.
Zaria asked, “Where can we see them? Can you bring us to see them?” (like they are some zoo animals)
We ate in this coffee shop, and it was mainly operated by elderly people.
I overheard Zara told Zaria, “Ipoh girls all old ladies only wut.”

When in Penang, there are 2 eateries that we’ll never miss. Nonya Breeze, and Jalan Siam Char Kuey Teow.
After an extremely satisfying dinner at the Jalan Siam Char Kuey Teow stall, seeing that the stall owners (father and son team) were less busy as it was the end of business day, both Daddy and myself went up to them and chatted a bit as well as praised them.
“Your char kuey teow is the best!” We told them.
When we went back the following day for another plate of char kuey teow, it wasn’t as satisfying, as I think the uncle put too much chilli in ours. And the girls too thought their plate of chilli-free kuey teow wasn’t as good as the night before.

We went to Nonya Breeze twice as well this round. Once for dinner, and once for lunch. It was good both times. We had this conversation in the car.
Daddy : We should have just eaten the char kuey teow once. Too much of a good thing is not good
Me : No not true, we ate Nonya Breeze twice and both were equally good.
Daddy : Hmm, yeah, why huh?
Zara : That’s because the char kuey teow man is a show off
Me : Huh?
Zara : Ya. You went and said his char kuey teow was good right the 1st time? So he became arrogant. That’s why 2nd time not so good already. Nonya Breeze you didn’t tell them their food was good, so they just continue to do what they do.
o.O”
(She believes that I shouldn’t praise her too, or she’ll be too proud. So everytime when I say played a piano piece well, or her drawing is nice, she’ll put her index finger on her lips and said, “sssssh..”)

On our way back from Penang, I told the girls, “So girls, we’d spent all our money in Penang. I guess we don’t have money for other holidays anymore.”
Zara replied, “You don’t lie to me. You only spend your Penang money. You still have Hong Kong money, Singapore money and other money you haven’t spent yet.”
I went, “Huh?”
Zara said, “Ya, you only spent your Penang dollar. Your Singapore dollar and Hong Kong dollar you didn’t use wutt. You don’t try to lie to me, ok.”
o.O”
Have to work on her money concept, this one.

Holiday Chitter Chatter Part 1

September 5, 2011 at 5:13 pm

I took off a couple of days last week, so that we can spend the girls’ school holidays together, and also go on our yearly trip to Penang.

Here are some conversations worthy to mention on our trip.

It was a wet day when we travelled to Penang. When we passed by the limestone hills in Ipoh, the girls saw the fluff of clouds floating around the hills. Zaria said, “Look, God’s spirit is everywhere.” o.O”

We talked about sleeping arrangement in the car. As Zaria has been really naughty the past few days, I told her, “I think I’ll sleep with jiejie, and Zaria can sleep with Daddy.”
She replied, “If I sleep with daddy, I’ll kungfu his kukujiao (Chinese : penis)” o.O”

Girls in Penang

We stayed in Traders Hotel in Penang. Every time when we turned on the TV, the Shangrila Hotel channel will come out first, showing the various Shangrila Hotels and Resorts world wide.
I commented one day, “These places are soooo nice, I wish I could go to these hotels to stay. Too bad your Daddy is not rich.”
Zara replied, “It’s not that he’s not rich. He’s cheap.” o.O”
Oh my, wonder what gave her that idea, but we had a good laugh hearing her reply.

Zaria told me later that when she’s older, she’ll bring me for holidays, and stay in those hotels. She said “I’ll bring you to Paris, and Italy.”
While swimming at the hotel pool, I asked Zaria to remove her float and tried to swim without (since she’s been attending swimming class for a month now).
She refused even after lots of persuation.
So I told her, “Next time when mummy is old, and you bring me for holidays, what if I fall into the sea, and you don’t know how to swim, then who’s going to save me?”
Zaria replied, “We are going to Paris. There’s no sea right?”
I told her in Paris there’s River Seine, a big river.
She then asked, “What about Italy? Is there river?”
I told her Italy is surrounded by the sea.
She thought for a while longer. “I think you go to Italy and Paris with jiejie (because Zara knows how to swim) then. I bring you to Ipoh.” o.O”

Jul Chitter Chatter

August 2, 2011 at 11:22 pm

Cheeky Zaria

At 4+, Zaria is still gullible enough to believe the lies I told things I said.

When I told her I was giong out with Aunty Dinah (Jazzmint‘s farewell), and kids were not allowed.
Zaria asked, “Why? They serve only beer in the restaurant? They serve only sambal?”
I lied answered and said Yes to those questions, and she said, “Oh, then I better don’t go too.”
Phew.

I bought 2 tickets to Jacky Cheung’s concert (Yippie), and I was planning to bring Zara with me (or maybe just go with Daddy).
Zaria cried when I told her I only bought tickets for Zara and myself.
I lied told her there was a height limit, and because she’s below 120cm, they wouldn’t sell me the ticket; also taking the opportunity to tell her she has to eat well to grow taller.
Zaria told me after she stopped crying, “I have an idea, you can buy me high heel shoes. And when I wear the high heel shoes to the concert, I’ll be tall enough.” o.O”
I told her that the tickets have been sold off (which is the truth), and no way I could get another ticket.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My girls have better sense than some racist goons out there.
I asked Zaria one day, “Mei Mei, do you know what race you are?”
Zaria replied, “I’m human race.”
(Best ever reply!)
When Zara got back home, I asked her the same question.
Zara replied, “You mean my culture?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zaria came back from school one day and told me, “Mummy, Aidan scratched my eye with his shoe. Can you report to the police?”
I told her ok, I’ll call the police later.
After 1 minute, she came back and told me, “I think better you don’t call the police, you tell his mummy, so that his mummy will beat his bumbum.”
(at least she has some compasion)

Zaria saw one of her stickers on Zara’s book.
Zaria : Maa, jiejie took my sticker without permission.
Me : So what should we do about that?
Zaria : Send (give) her to another family.
Me : Do you really want to do that?
Zaria : Actually I do not want to do that, but the only way to teach her is to punish her. o.O”

One day Zaria refused to do her Chinese reading, and I had to push and push her. She then declared, “I wish I have no mommy!”
The following day when I picked her and her carpool friend from school, she told her car pool friend “You know, if your mommy is fierce it’s actualy good. It’s to teach you good things you know.” o.O”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zaria saw the neighbour went topless watering his plant.
Zaria : “Eeeeyer Mum, why is Uncle P not wearing his clothes?”
Me : “He’s hot I think… If mommy is hot can mommy take off my clothes?”
Zaria : “Eeeyer.. no mum, because you are a big breasted lady.” o.O”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On another day.
Zaria : Mom, you should put a Y in my name. Now it’s Za-ri-AH. If you put a Y, then only it becomes Za-ri-YAH.
Me : So how should your name be spelled?
Zaria : You should spell my name as Z-A-R-I-Y-A. o.O”

中文程度

May 11, 2011 at 10:08 pm

(You’ll probably be able to relate to this more if you know Chinese)

After more than 4 months in a Chinese school, how is Zara doing in her Chinese? I would say she’s doing well, but her Chinese is probably at the level of a 5year old native speaker. I’ll quote some examples later.

What language do they speak in school? She told me when she’s in her class, she and her friends speak in Mandarin; but once outside the class, they will start conversing in English. Her school has many English speaking kids, so this is good, as she still gets to speak English while improving her Chinese. However, the down side is, she started mixing 2 languages in her speech, unconciously.

She told the teacher, an Indian, from the maths centre, “Teacher, I got 一百分for my maths in school.” She repeated a few times and couldn’t comprehends why the teacher didn’t understand her, not knowing she said, 一百分 instead of one hundred.

So to make her concious of only speaking 1 language at a time, I implemented a system for her and her (carpool) friend, James, in the car. Each day, they are to speak only 1 language, either English or Chinese, fully, on our journey home. On an English day, should they or even myself accidentally use any Chinese words, we’ll have to pay a RM0.10 fine, and vice versa.

Initially, we collected a lot of fines, but after a while, I saw them making a concious effort to speak only 1 language. This helps to improve their Chinese proficiency too, because on Chinese day, they’ll try very hard to find the word they need to describe something.

Here are some “Chinese Day” conversation taken on our journey home.

Zara : 今天,有个男孩子…err.. muak muak 我的朋友Ohana. [Today, there’s a boy who muak muak my friend Ohana] (obviously she doesn’t know how to say kiss in Chinese)
Me : 今天, 有个男孩子吻我的朋友 [Today, there’s a boy who kissed my friend] (corrected her)
Zara : (repeated) 吻我的朋友 [Kissed my friend]
Me : Ohana是马来人吗?[Is Ohana a Malay?]
Zara : 不是, 她是中文. [No, she’s Chinese language] o.O” (She’s supposed to say 华人or中国人the words for Chinese people)

She was playing this hand game with James.
Zara : 公鸡, 母鸡, 小鸡, kay-poh-jee [rooster, hen, chick, kay poh jee]
Me : kay-poh-jee 不是中文来的,kay-poh-jee中文是八卦 [kay poh jee (nosy) is not Mandarin, kay poh jee in Mandarin is 八卦]
James : 啊我知道, Bak-gua [Oh, I know, Bak-gua (BBQ pork slices in Hokkien)] o.O”

I asked James if he likes Chocolate cake.
James : 我不喜欢, 因为那个蛋糕很….我不会讲那个字, 我可以讲英文吗? [I don’t like, because the cake is very …. I don’t know how to say the word, can I speak English?]
Me : OK
James : Very strong (concentrated)
Zara : 哦我知道那个字, “很有力”. [oh, I know the word, it’s very strong (in strength).] o.O” She doesn’t know how to say the word 浓 (the Chinese word for concentrated).

Zaria’s Chitter Chatter April

May 6, 2011 at 8:49 pm

Little Chilli Padi

Some of these I’d had put up on Facebook, but here is to put everything on 1 page.

Now although I’m a born Catholic, I rarely go to church, which means the girls too don’t go to church except the 2 times we went to attend my grandfather’s funeral service, and his memorial service.
One Sunday, I just felt like going to church, and I brought the girls along.
After a few minutes in the church, Zaria asked, “Nobody’s dead. So why are we here?” o.O”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Most churches nowadays do have some sort of band, so the one that we went to is no exception. After attending that mass, we drove passed the mosque on a Friday and Zaria asked why there were so many cars parked along the road.
I explained to her that people are going to the mosque to play.
She asked, “Do they have a band in the mosque?” o.O”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The was a particular week that she was extremely naughty.
I said to her, “these few days you very naughty huh?”
Zaria was quiet for a moment, then added, “Yeah yeah yeah, if you want to go to another country (remembering my Hong Kong trip), just go then. I still need you but if you don’t need me, you just go ahead and do it.” o.O”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Over dinner, Zaria licked pieces of food fr the common dish, so I threatened to smack her if she did it again. She frowned and said You have a beautiful child and you want smack her?” o.O”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zaria kept asking for a chick as a pet after her visit to the Bird’s Park.
I told her, “Do you know chicks will grow up to be chickens? And what will you do when they are no longer cute and become chickens?”
She replied, “Then I fry it and eat it.” o.O” Talk about loyalty.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We had a casual talk about growing old.
Zaria : “I don’t want you to grow old mom.”
Me : “But I’m going to grow old…. So what will you do when I grow old?”
Zaria : “I’ll push you into the river.” o.O”
Zara who over heard this chipped in : “You cannot push mommy into the river. You have to take care of her when she’s old.”
Zaria : “Ok then, I won’t push you into the river, I’ll bring you to jiejie’s house and she can take care of you.” o.O”
A couple of days later, I asked her if she really meant to put me in jiejie’s house, and she won’t look after me when I was old.
Zaria replied “I can always go and visit you, ok?” o.O”
Talk about filial peity.

Arguing with a 3 year old

January 15, 2010 at 5:54 pm

Zaria is getting good with arguments these days.

Can’t remember why, but she was angry with Jelly.
Zaria : “Auntie I don’t want you any more”
Me : “Ok, then we pack auntie’s bags, tonight she’ll take airasia flight, and go back. Tomorrow you won’t see her any more.”
Zaria : “No I don’t want.”
Me : “Then why you said you don’t want her.”
Zaria : (innocently) “I didn’t say anything.”
o.O”

And then another, she got angry with me.
Zaria : (towards me) “I don’t want you any more”
Me : “Ok then, later, I go stay in hotel”
Zara : “If Zaria said that again, then you and I will go somewhere together.”
Zaria : “Stop it! I say stop it.”
Me : “What’s wrong?”
Zaria : “You said you are going somewhere without me, so I’m very angry with you (pointed to me), and you (pointed to Zara)! You cannot go anywhere without me. Hmmmph!” (folded her arms)
Daddy : “I won’t go anywhere without you. Don’t worry.”
Zaria : “Hmph! I don’t believe you.”
Daddy : “I cross my heart.”
Zaria : (pointed to me and Zara) “You and jiejie also must cross your heart(s).”
o.O”

During dinner 1 day, she was drinking water by holding a cup with single hand.
Daddy : “Zaria, you are still a small girl, use two hands to hold your cup.”
She didn’t listen and midway through dinner, she spilled her whole cup of water.
Me : “See?”
She started defending herself (and blaming everybody but herself).
Zaria : “Auntie! Why you put the cup so near to me!”
Jelly : “Aiya mei, I didn’t touch your cup at all.”
Zaria : “Daddy! It’s your fault then!”
Daddy : “Huh? I didn’t do anything, why is it my fault?”
Zaria : “I’m still a small girl, and you never help me hold my cup! That’s why it’s your fault!”
o.O”

(seriously, I have to discount everything she said)

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